She is ferociously longing for you, hungry and alive with passion.
You say you have been waiting for Her, and you are starving, yet are you courageous enough to let Her all the way in to permanently satisfy your hunger?
Do you even know what that feels like to fully allow her existence alive, in you?
Is your desire and craving so intense and powerful to be met that when you find her, you fear that she may do exactly that...satisfy you?
And the denial that you long so deeply to be met by her has you deeply numbing out, escaping into short-lived pleasures that you call "Her" but they leave you more malnourished than before.
And then you fear Her love because it might be taken away like every other who has loved you and left you again alone in love, abandoned and reminding you of the value that you have placed on your head. No value. The same story of always that perpetuates the cycle of devaluation to never being able to do enough, achieve enough, add enough to you to be worth that love that you seek.
Is it possible that you could be so well met and matched that you would have to drop the story that you cannot find The One?
Would you even know Her if she was right in front of you?
Because maybe the love you are seeking requires a real action hero to face his own self-denial, self-neglect, self-abandonment, self-hatred, superficiality, pride, anger, judgment, greed, lust to allow her fully in to love him there too, sacredly and compassionately.
To stop the collective cycle of numbing out and running from his longing, adding so much to himself as to not even recognize himself as THE ONE he has been waiting for.
Where his own self-unavailability has been disguised as a charismatic actor only to emotionally shut down when she appears and asks him to champion his own inner-landscape, and tend to his self-neglect and past pain maintained through keeping her love out.
And maybe he does not know if he can?
If you desire this meeting of sacred, raw, and tender divine union, then it seems you may have no choice but to surrender…and let her all the way in.
All it seems to require is a commitment to All that Is, Truth. How honest and in integrity can you be, hero? You alone are your own savior?
She is The One who brings everlasting Life to the dead.
How hungry are you to live...?
She is already here, waiting for you, inside you.
Will you let Her love you?